Ditch that screen and shift your focus 

Kids love the internet, and it’s easy to see why. Digital devices give them access to games, education, entertainment, and their friends. And as they get older, teens can keep up to date on current events, get exposure to different people and cultures, and build meaningful connections with their peers.  

Of course, all that connectivity can come at a cost. Social media can be a source of bullying and peer pressure for children and younger teens. And it can take time away from imaginative play and learning. Social media apps, designed to keep us scrolling, commenting, and liking for hours, can eat up time for homework, school, family, and real-life relationships.  

According to a 2022 Pew Research Center survey, 45 percent of teens said they were online almost constantly. Not surprisingly, the pull of being online doesn’t ease with age: Parents admitted to spending an average of nine hours and 22 minutes every day in front of various screens, according to a study by Common Sense Media. And over three hours of that time was spent watching TV, while more than an hour was spent on social media.  

Here’s how to help your whole household create a better balance. 

 Be a device-free role model 

It’s important to spend quality, screen-free hours with your family, and it’s just as vital for them to see you enjoying unplugged time alone (say, while reading an old-fashioned book). So set screen time limits and bedtime cutoffs not just on your family’s devices but also your own. You’ll model for them that life doesn’t happen exclusively online. During this time: 

• Be present 
• Make eye contact 
• Have conversations 

Spending less time online and more time together as a family demonstrates that they’re valued and gives them a strong sense of self. 

Stay in the know 

Monitoring your family’s digital activities and discussing what they’re up to can help too. Research shows more than 90 percent of parents have talked to their children about appropriate behavior online, including what to share and how to interact with others. Many parents also follow their children’s social media profiles so they can keep an eye on what gets posted and who is connecting with their kids. 

Know the age requirement and stick to it 

It feels like kids are asking for their own social media accounts from the time they learn to talk. But there’s something you may not be aware of: Nearly all social media platforms require users to be 13 or older to access and use their services. This age limit was set by the federal Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act. 

Even if your child is 13 or older, they may not be quite ready to have an online profile. It’s sometimes hard for adults to put social media posts in perspective, and kids have an even tougher time with that. So, consider your own child’s maturity level when making decisions about social media: Can they handle the social pressures, the inevitable risks, and the big emotions that can come with social media use? Decide what’s right for your child as an individual. 

Keep your head up (literally) 

When parents default to burrowing into screens rather than interacting with the people in the room with them, kids learn that behavior. This can affect how you and your child interact day to day, and even who kids turn to for important guidance. Be receptive to your kids and you’ll be better poised to continue to guide them as they navigate the complicated years ahead of them. 

Remember that social media is fiction 

“It’s easy to compare yourself to others, and kids don’t always realize that what people post on social media represents the good side of their lives,” says Steve Simpson, author of The Teenage and Young Adult Survival Handbook. “They’re not showing the struggles.”  

This is where you come in. It is up to parents to model how to be a smart consumer of media, and to remind their families there is more to everyone’s story than what is posted on social media.